Listening to the Father

Our Holy Father Pope Benedict XVI is resigning as the Pope.  He is stepping down as the leader of the Roman Catholic Church because that is where his discernment has led him.  This is what he believes to be God's will both for his life and for the Church.  This is what he has heard from the Father in the silence of his prayer.  It is always awesome to see someone discern God's will and then follow it.  It is exciting to see someone do what they believe to be the right thing.  And so ever since hearing the news about Pope Benedict, I have been really pumped and filled with joy at seeing this good man do what he believes to be God's will.

This past Sunday I had the opportunity to join several thousand others in St. Peter's Square for Pope Benedict's last Sunday Angelus.  Every Sunday the pope makes an address (usually a reflection on the Gospel reading of that week), leads everyone there in a prayer called the Angelus, and then greets all of the different language groups and people present from all over the world, in their language.  In addition to the Sunday Angelus, the Holy Father also holds a public audience every Wednesday morning.  These gatherings tend to be more informal and usually include some form of a teaching from the pope as well as an occasional guest bishop, head of state, performer, etc.  Some of the seminarians at the NAC make it to just about every Sunday Angelus; it becomes a part of their weekly routine.  I try to make it about once a month, and this was my first  Angelus since Super Bowl Sunday.

This past Sunday was Pope Benedict's last Sunday Angelus, and you could tell.  There was something special about this gathering.  By the time I got to the Square it was packed.  The whole of St. Peter's Square was filled with people from all over the world.  Some waved flags, some held banners.  Some talked and sang songs, some stood silently in prayer.  Some pushed to get closer, some climbed onto the shoulders of a friend to get a better view.

Standing under the colonnade, leaning on one of the columns I saw a steady stream of people entering the Square.  I saw men and women, young and old, priests and religious sisters, families and parish groups.  At one point I saw several older Italian women entering the Square.  By this point the place was packed and everyone was standing shoulder to shoulder, and I overheard one of the women, who was a little shorter than me... which is pretty short, say, "As long as we can hear him.  That is enough."


Immediately I started to think of everyone back in Baltimore who I wish could have been there with me.  And so I tried my best to bring them all there in prayer.  My family, my friends, teachers, coworkers, parishioners, students, brother priests and seminarians, etc.  As I was praying for all of these people, a humble Pope Benedict XVI emerged at his window, the same window from which many popes before him have spoken, including his predecessor John Paul II, the same window from which on October 11, 1962 a joy-filled John XXIII delivered his famous "Discorso della Luna" address on the eve of the opening of the Second Vatican Council-- expressing his paternal love to the whole world, the same window from which our Holy Father Benedict XVI addressed the world on that same day 50 years later-- expressing the same paternal love and affection, while at the same time acknowledging the sobering reality of the great work that lies ahead of us as the Church.  On October 11, 2012 Pope Benedict said, "Over these fifty years we have seen the reality of original sin, and we have seen the reality of personal sin... we have also had in these fifty years a new experience of the presence of God."  He went on to talk about how God has remained with us, never abandoning us; how God has continued to transform and illumine us.  The fire of Christ and the fire of the Holy Spirit continues to bear light in our lives.


As Pope Benedict emerged in this historic window the crowd erupted in applause.  He put his hands up in his typical gesture of greeting large crowds, and then without hesitation dove into the Gospel, which in this case was the account of the Transfiguration in the Gospel of Luke.  In his reflection, Pope Benedict pointed to the relationship between the Father and the Son-- the relationship that is for us the grounding and font of all life and all hope and all truth and all love.  He said, "Jesus was transfigured as he prayed: his is a profound experience of relationship with the Father during a sort of spiritual retreat that Jesus lives on a high mountain..."  During this spiritual retreat Jesus listened to the Father.  He communed with the Father.  He abandoned himself to the will of the Father.

After his Scriptural reflection, the Holy Father made an unusual transition in subject-- he spoke to us about himself.  He addressed us as a man who wants to convey something personal.  He said, "Dear brothers and sisters, I feel that this Word of God is particularly directed at me, at this point in my life.  The Lord is calling me to 'climb the mountain', to devote myself even more to prayer and meditation.  But this does not mean abandoning the Church!  Indeed, if God is asking me to do this it is so that I can continue to serve the Church with the same dedication and the same love with which I have done thus far, but in a way that is better suited to my age and my strength."

At this point the thousands gathered in St. Peter's Square were in silence, something that is not particularly normal.  The atmosphere was one of prayer.  I think that part of this silent reverence was in a way a certain awe that we all had-- awe at a man listening to God's voice and daring to follow it.  Awe at realizing that we have a God who speaks to us, who calls us to a greater friendship.

He then led us in the Angelus.  After the Angelus he proceeded to greet and address the different language groups present in their language.  As he did this you could hear in his voice echoes of the heart.  You could hear his fatigue.  You could hear his tiredness.  But through the fatigue, you could hear the effort with which he did his very best to pronounce every word of each of these greetings.  After these greetings he waved to the crowd one last time and then proceeded to give us and our loved ones his blessing.

Watching and listening to Benedict XVI on Sunday I couldn't help but be moved by what all he has endured as our Holy Father, what all he has led us through.  And at the same time what all remains to be done.  I continue to be in total awe and gratitude to Pope Benedict throughout this selfless discernment.  He truly believes that he has heard the voice of the Father calling him to a new service, a new labor of love.  I suspect that though we will likely no longer see or hear from him, Pope Benedict will enter into a powerful solidarity with us, with all of us in the human family.  In his prayer, in our prayer, we are one.

Tomorrow, Wednesday, I will be going to Pope Benedict's last public appearance-- his Wednesday audience in St. Peter's Square.  The crowd is expected to be enormous, and so a few friends and I are planning on heading down there around 6:30 or 7:00 to get in line.  The Square will open at 8:00 and the Holy Father's address will begin at 10:30.